Everyone wants to be liked. The harsh truth is not everyone is compatible with everyone else. There are always going to be people who just rub you the wrong way—and you’re included in that, too! However, there are some simple dos and don’ts when it comes to courting favor with others. Follow these simple tips, and you’ll start to see your popularity improving!
1. Remain Open Minded
Nothing’s such a turn off as when you’re talking to someone and they simply refuse to hear what you have to say. Make sure you’re not guilty of this, by listening to what other people want to share with you. You don’t have to like it, you don’t have to agree. However, both parties can learn a lot of they remain civil and willing to consider what the other person is saying.
The more approachable you are, the more people will warm to you.
2. Avoid Gossip
This might seem like a no-brainer, but you’d be surprised how easy it is to get drawn into talking about someone else. A general rule of thumb is if you wouldn’t say it when the person was standing next to you, don’t say it when they’re not in earshot. If you’re in a group where others start talking about someone behind their back, it’s best to walk away.
Even if you weren’t involved in the conversation, your presence there might easily make you look guilty by association.
3. Remain Mysterious
Sharing too much too soon is a good way to distance people. Everyone has their own set of problems and issues they’re dealing with. If you’re too open about what’s going on in your life at the start of any relationship, you might come across as self-absorbed. Remain a bit reserved about what’s happening in your own life, and try asking the other people about their interests instead.
4. Stay Humble
Just like everyone has their own set of issues with which they’re dealing, everyone’s had their 15 seconds of fame, too. No one person is greater or lesser than anyone else. Boasting about where you’ve been, what you’ve accomplished, or who you know comes over like a cry for attention.
Don’t fight to make your presence known by name dropping or trying to appear better than someone else. It will only estrange people from getting to know the real you.
5. Remain Calm
Throwing a temper tantrum is a child’s response to what they dislike. It’s not a particularly effective way to make your point known as an adult, no matter how angry or hurt you may be—and may actually complicate things, or draw negative attention your way.
If you feel your blood pressure rising or the tears about to fall, excuse yourself and seek somewhere private to regain your composure. This doesn’t mean you have to be made of stone or never express your emotions, but there’s a time and a place for doing so.
The start of a relationship or when you’re first getting to know a new set of colleagues or teammates is not that time or place. There’s a time and a place for doing so.
6. Pay Attention
Nothing is more of a turn off than people who aren’t respectful of others. Imagine how you’d feel if you were confiding in someone and they just got up and left the room! Playing with your phone in the middle of a discussion is exactly the same thing.
We live in a technological age where we’re constantly connected via cellphones and social media, and it often means that priorities get inverted. Unless it’s an emergency call, leave the phone alone when you’re socializing with others. Society managed without mobile phones until the last couple of decades. You can manage without yours for the length of a conversation.
7. Remain Cheerful
There’s an old saying that misery loves company, and while some people take great satisfaction in bringing others down to their doleful mood, it’s not exactly a way to initiate closeness. People who complain too much come over as victims of their circumstances. It’s also possible to be too serious—even when it comes to a hobby that ignites your passion.
Being engrossed in your work or your project is one thing, but remember to make time to play, too. This not only helps to keep you rejuvenated and refreshed while you’re focusing, but it confirms that you know how to balance lightheartedness with determination, making you desirable when it comes to team efforts.
You’re never going to please all of the people all of the time, so don’t even try. Let the people who don’t like you be entitled to their opinion—after all, it’s a viewpoint, not a fact. The most important things are to follow your heart, look for reasons to be happy, take time for others, be respectful, and don’t make any crisis into a drama.
If you can do that, you’ll find that not only do the people who can help you achieve your goals start to appear in your life, but you’ll also be leading by example for others. It’s a win/win situation, all around!
Related Article: 5 Easy Ways to Create More Peace and Harmony in All Relationships